“Let tension refine your intention.”
– Jami Coffman
Do you often find yourself in tension as a leader? If so, you are not alone. Leadership naturally puts you in a place of continual challenges. The differentiator is how you frame the tension. Do you treat it as an enemy or as a friend?
For a month, the interplay between two words has continually come up in my daily life. The words are “tension” and “intention.” They both originate from the Latin word “tendre,” which means “to stretch, extend.” The prefix “in” means “towards.”
The persistent recurrence of these words has grabbed my attention. The root of attention also contains the word tendre. So I decided to pay attention to these words and share 10 insights to help you use intention to navigate the tension of leadership.
- You have an original intention in who you are made to be
There is no one in the world exactly like you. You have a unique DNA, background, and experiences. Remember to seek and stay true to your essence. Also, be aware that others are unique beings, too. Stay true to who you are while also being curious about others’ uniqueness.
- The intention to seek can be the point while in tension.
When we are in tension, we are being stretched, which doesn’t always feel good. Because tension is uncomfortable, we often try to relieve it quickly, which can lead to reactivity or premature fixing. But the point of tension can be to grow us, which can take time.
This is not procrastination or avoidance. It is instead a form of active waiting. It is active because the answer is to seek. It is an engagement with the tension to prompt us to pay attention, along with a rest in being out of control with timing, but a trust and pursuit that the clarity will come.
- Use intention during tension to clarify prioritization
Sometimes tension comes out of “too much.” There can be too much on our schedule, too many choices, too many responsibilities, etc. Allow the tension to prompt you to seek the intention of “What is most important right now?”
- Tension as a personal refiner to clarify your pure intention
See tension as an opportunity to refine yourself. Right action is moving forward with the right people at the right time for the right reasons. Let the tension surface what has been submerged, so the best intention leads the way.
- Listen to the tension to prompt you into retreat to discover intention
This may require you to retreat inwards into reflection. Tension often convinces us we don’t have time. But, in reality, the tension may be a warning light that is saying you can’t afford not to invest the time to slow down and seek.
- The interaction of tension and intention may require endurance over time for a reason.
Sometimes the clarity of intention happens quickly. Other times, it requires endurance. Sometimes there is a purpose in building an intention that becomes a habit. It may require building a new mindset or behavior over time. Sometimes it helps to remember that sustainable growth takes time.
- The tension and intention may require interacting with others
Where do we need others to help us seek intention well? Others can see our blind spots. Sometimes we can “navel gaze” too much, and we need the insight of others. Others may be feeling tension too. The way forward can include them in the seeking too.
- Be pure intention when others are in tension
It is not all about you! Yes, be aware of the tension you are in, but also pay attention to when others may be in tension. This is the power of empathy. Step into the tension with them simply to be present with them. Don’t rush to fix; simply support them in their own navigation toward pure intention.
- Tension is sometimes called conflict with an opportunity to bring clear intention
Conflict is the tension of different perspectives. This is not bad or something to squash. Instead, engage in the tension by seeking. Remember that tension means to stretch. Sometimes stretching happens as a team, too. Remember that the point of tension may be to seek, not to resolve immediately. Hold your idea while also seeking others’ perspectives. This purifies intention as a team.
- Incorporate rhythms and disciplines that help you seek intention in the tension
I find this requires a bio-psycho-social approach. What practices do you incorporate so that you are operating not in fear during tension but thriving? What practices promote positive mindsets, behaviors, and social supports that help you engage in tension as a friend instead of as an enemy?
Summary
Leaders live in the space of tension. They lead the way into the unknown, into continuous improvement, through problem-solving, and into the vision of something new. Learning to navigate the interplay of tension and intention is a must for high-impact leadership. Which of the above tips will you put into action?