Secrets of Leadership: Trust and Vulnerability

“Based on my experience working with teams during the past 10 years or so, I’ve come to one inescapable conclusion: no quality or characteristic is more important than trust. In fact, my work with teams resolves around trust more than any other topic.” – Patrick Lencioni, author of The Five Dysfunctions of a Team

Trust is the foundation for any team to move forward to achieve great results. But what keeps us from trust and where does it start? Even though trust is a component of a team of people, I think that first we must look at it from an individual level. Each individual in a team must engage in trust. What will help them to take that step?

A Trust Obstacle: Fear of Vulnerability

One of the beginning steps of trust is vulnerability. A component of trusting teams is when members share their weaknesses and ask for help. However, this goes against an often held image of what a leader should be like. Instead we often have a mindset that leaders cannot show weaknesses.

A study conducted by the Center for Leadership Development and Research at Stanford Graduate School of Business, Stanford University’s Rock Center for Corporate Governance, and The Miles Group revealed that nearly two-thirds of CEOs do not receive coaching or leadership advice from outside consultants or coaches, even though most of them would be open to receiving coaching (Stanford Graduate School of Business, 2013 Executive Coaching Survey). What may often keep leaders from seeking outside help is the fear of how they will be perceived.

As leaders we fear how we will be perceived if we ask for help from anyone. It could be help from an outside coach or it could be help from a team member.

Vulnerability as a Step to Trust

Leaders need to first develop personal self-awareness. They need to recognize where they have strengths and also weaknesses. Coaching is a safe place to help build awareness so that a leader is ready to be vulnerable. Leaders need to find safe places to practice being vulnerable and then learn how to apply with their team members.

Patrick Lencioni’s most recommended tools for building trust are using personal histories and understanding your way of being and communicating with others through behavioral profiles. These are all tools that can be explored through coaching.

Stephen Miles, CEO of The Miles Group states, “Becoming CEO doesn’t mean that you suddenly have all the answers, and these top executives realize that there is room for growth for everyone. We are moving away from coaching being perceived as ‘remedial’ to where it should be: something that improves performance, similar to how elite athletes use a coach.”

I have a past client who has recently met some of her goals for her leadership development that she defined and set to achieve during a coaching process. And part of her reaching her potential included her becoming aware of some of her fears. She had to be vulnerable. This set her up to be more honest with her team and propelled her to results.

Do you know what your strengths and weaknesses are? Do you ask for help? Are you and your team members vulnerable? If you would like to learn more about your strengths and weaknesses for building trust, contact me for a free profile and assessment.

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