“There are three kinds of men, ones that learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.”
– Will Rogers
I shared the above quote on the Imajine Unlimited Facebook page this past month, and it was well received with “likes” and comments. Most of us can relate to how we have tried to change using all three of the methods in that quote.
This month’s article focuses on change, and specifically how we can influence change. Authors Kerry Paterson, Joseph Grenny, David Maxfield, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler have written an insightful book called, Influencer, The Power to Change Anything. This book has become a staple in my library.
Because of its breadth of information, I decided it would be helpful to use it in a nine article series. As I continue to talk to clients and community groups, the discussion of change continues to be a very popular topic. I hope you find the series helpful.
Enjoy!
Jami Coffman
Individual & Corporate Coach
You Can Be an Influencer – Part I
Have you ever felt like you were facing a hopeless situation? People commonly can relate to points in their lives when they hit a situation where change was immensely needed, but they felt powerless to make a difference.
It could be at work. You try to warn the people in your company that change is needed to keep up with competition, but they don’t listen and complain instead. You may have faced it at home. You are unhappy with your spouse and the list of frustrations is long. You don’t even know where to start to bring about change. Or, it could be in your community. The community has stopped growing, and everyone knows it. Some care and some don’t. Quick fix projects are continually tried, but nothing brings lasting results. You wonder what else could be done.
Circles of Control
So where do we have control? The power of control can visually be seen as three circles. Picture in your mind a bike wheel. The outside circle is the tire. The inside of the wheel consists of spokes, and at the center of the wheel is the hub. Picture this bike wheel with its three circles as we discuss the three circles of control.
The outside circle on the bike wheel is the tire, and represents where we have no control or very little impact upon as an individual. Examples could be the weather, a decision made in the global economy that has a ripple effect to your company, or your credit card company has (once again!) adopted a new rule that has made it even more difficult to redeem your rewards.
The next circle on the bike is the spokes and represents where we have influence. We can’t control the situation or people involved, but we can have influence. This circle could include family, co-workers, team project results, or your dog.
The final circle on our bike wheel is the hub, the inner most circle. This is where we have full control. So, is there anything in life where we have full control? Yes, the answer is our own person. The one thing you can fully control is yourself.
You may say, “But wait, you don’t know all of the limitations that have been placed upon my life.” And, I won’t deny that we all have limitations. However, we also always have a choice.
The Chinese symbol for “Crisis” consists of two symbols that represent both danger and opportunity. You have a choice on how you view the crisis. Do you see it as an opportunity or as danger? How you view it will determine how you act.
Just as we have a choice with a crisis, so we also have choices with limitations or anything else that floats into that hub, the inner circle of our wheel.
Becoming an Influencer
I believe that it is possible to change anything. However, we have all hit those situations where it has just seemed impossible. I know that I have. You feel like you are hitting your head against a wall. But just because something appears incredibly difficult, does not mean that it is impossible.
In their book, Influencer: The Power to Change Anything, the authors have said, “They’ve discovered that when it comes to changing the world, what most of us lack is not the courage to change things, but the skill to do so.” The authors have studied successful change movements from around the world and from their study have dissected out the critical sources of influence that make change inevitable.
One of the groups they study is the Delancey Street Foundation. All of the employees of the companies in this organization are felons or addicts, except for the Executive Director. There are no professional staffs, grants or guards. Yet of the 14,000 employees over the past 30 years over 90 percent never go back to drugs or crime. What is the foundation of their success? – A powerful influence strategy.
The authors of the book, Influencer, have studied multiple influence masters; however, they have not found ONE influence strategy that works for every situation. Instead, they have uncovered multiple strategies. This is often why there is not “a magic wand” to solving persistent problems that need change. Instead, a combination of influence methods is needed for the solution. The good news is that these methods can be learned and applied.
Another key to influence is that all persistent problems are related to behavior, and behavior is linked to how we think. They found that the influence masters are often students of psychologist Albert Bandura. The authors have said,
Summary
Control can be visualized within three circles. The start of any change movement starts at the inner circle, ourselves. To become an influencer, we first must believe that we can influence.
Often we can easily see ourselves as a victim in this big world. It starts with our self-image. You have a choice. Will you see yourself as a victim or take responsibility to be an influencer? Your choice will impact every person in your life, from family to work and community. Are they worth it to you to step up to the challenge?
Future articles in this series will look at these proven methods of influence. I hope that you take joy that there is hope for change!